I remember the first time I saw her. It was June of 1995. She was wearing a pair of very short shorts with polka dots, with a matching halter top that tied in the back. Her long reddish brown hair hung down below her shoulders. Her eyes were sometimes green, but sometimes seemed more blue, depending on her mood.
She was about 5 foot 3 inches tall, to my 5 foot 5. She resembled a young Shirley McClain or Ann Margarete.
I found out later she'd been asking around about me and was flattered and surprised that she even took an interest, as I had thought myself to be almost invisible to women at that time. That is, with the exception of the girl I'd met two weeks before, whom I had taken a liking to, or so I thought; until I saw her.
The gentle summer wind blew her hair across her face as we exchanged small talk. I even mentioned the girl I'd met recently, and how I was supposed to meet her after I got off work. That's when it began.
She looked so hurt at the mention of "Penny" that I honestly felt as though she was going to cry. I wanted to apologize. I was shocked and amazed that this stunning beauty would be interested in me. She seemed clearly out of my league.
At that moment I decided to investigate further, and gathered up the nerve to ask her name. "Jen", she replied. I asked if she would like to go for coffee as my shift was almost over. She anxiously agreed, with an almost childlike innocence. She couldn't hide her excitement. I was floored.
When we got to the restaurant she sat across from me. And before long we were holding hands. We talked for hours, seeming more like old friends who hadn't seen each other in a long while rather than strangers who had only just met. I felt the pieces of the puzzle falling together as we both shared stories of love gone wrong. I felt the movie starting in my head. The way we fit seemed almost perfect. Seamless. That night in the parking lot she held me so close to her I never wanted to leave. We agreed to meet again the next evening and I went home. That night I couldn't sleep. I struggled with the thought of what to do about Penny, and decided that because Penny was five years younger than I, and had never been in a serious relationship before, I was afraid I'd become her training officer. Thinking she would find someone else more her age, I decided to end things with her to devote myself to this new possibility. And regardless of where things went with Jen, I didn't want to play around with Penny's feelings.
Over the next few days we met each night to talk and get to know each other. The pain I saw in her eyes mirrored my own, and we bonded over that sense that people who share a common disaster have, like people in the same plane crash. As time went on she promised no one would ever hurt me again. I believed her. Every word. She asked me to move in to the upper flat which till recently had been her parents' place. I agreed. Two weeks in I moved my few belongings in. And so it all began...
To be continued...
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